"Time makes heroes but dissolves celebrities."

-Daniel J. Boorstin

Hey Everybody!
Just a quick-ish journal from me this time where I throw in my two cents about the mundane and banal events in the wide world entirely too late to be "with-it" or relevant.

Now of course, I could talk about the repugnant gutting of union workers rights in Wisconsin. Or the ongoing conflict in North Africa where it's still clear after 40 years that Muammar Gaddafi doesn't understand the meaning of "GTFO!" Or I could even talk about the series of events which lead to what some of the malleable-minded are calling "End times-proceeding events" in the island nation of Japan, events easily understandable if we lived on a planet moved by the laws of Physics (which we happen to) and which nonetheless underscores how much se should offer support and condolences to the Japanese people in this trial by seismic upheaval and radiation.

Hell, I could even talk about that Egyptian cobra that escaped from the Bronx Zoo... Even though most people seem to be forgetting that cobras are endothermic creatures and, well, given that at night here in the northeastern US the temperatures are still dropping below freezing. Meaning that there's very little chance the cobra would even survive an escape attempt from the zoo grounds.

... But where, I ask you, where on Deviant Art are you going to find a picture of the very cobra that escaped?

My GALLERY! That's where!



And where are you NOT going to find that picture? ... That's right! YOUR gallery!
... Statistically speaking.

But anyway... Back to the promised topic from the header of this journal.
Surely you, citizen of the internet, have heard of this thirteen-year-old lass named Rebecca Black who, through some means, scraped together some $25,000.00 and made a music video. A music video that is now famous almost entirely for how much it is reviled for it's abysmal lyrics and vapid lack of substance.
[link]
Now, my first response when I heard this song was;

"This is fucking identical to ever other insipid pop song on pop radio... Why in god's name was THIS one singled out for ridicule?"

I've always have tastes and preferences that were askew from my peer group. This is the explanation for my tendency to be guarded and secretive about the books, movies, TV shows and music that I like. I normally operate under the assumption that if I really enjoy something, my praise of it will fall on deaf ears if I try to expound on it's virtues to most of the people in my life.

... And you know something? I'm usually right.

One of my more lasting memories was my senior year in high school was when I was browsing for CD's at the music store (remember those, kids?) in my local mall. And I ran across two acquaintances of mine. Hardly friends, but they never called me a faggot and so I tended to like them. They were shopping for whatever was the latest-released or most relevant artist at that time.
They stared at me with slack-jawed expressions when they saw I was buying a CD of Chinese bamboo flute music. [link]

Anyway. The point of all this is that I really have no perspective when it comes to popular music.
I listen to a song like "Friday" and I can barely understand why it's catching so much flack when a song like "I got a feeling" from the Black-Eyed Peas [link] can pass under the radar with almost NO negative criticism... Well, almost none. [link]

Seriously... "Till the world ends" by Britney Spears [link] (that's also the grammatically incorrect use of the word "Till" by the way. )

"Turn it up" by Kim Kardashian [link]

And "Friday" is the song that the media and culture on the whole choses to fix it's sights on?!

My god... A monkey wrote the lyrics to each and every one of these songs with his penis on a legal pad... Why would anyone consider one more worthy of scorn than another?

... Ah well. I guess I'll never understand.

And another person I'll never understand (what a clever segway that is) is Charlie Sheen.

Once again I'm coming in well under the wire on this one, and I probably wouldn't have even heard the radio babble that (might have?) started his whole thing had I not started listening to "Hollywood Babble-On" with Kevin Smith and Ralph Garman.
For those of you who, like me, have other things to occupy yourselves with than the doings of famous and entirely overrated mammals such as Charlie Sheen, here it is again.
[link]
Once again my vexation on this one is similar to the fascination with the hatred directed at Rebecca Black. Why are we as a people so interested in the ramblings of this half-mad, half-insane malcontent?
Is he trying to be funny as some have suggested? Who can really tell. I've never cared for that style of "humor" myself, so I really can't say.
If we want to see a jackass "mocking" himself in the same vein as and using the same arguments that their detractors use as sticking points against them... It's been done. [link]

And once again, what makes this particular bloated ego so special?
Our culture practically breeds beings who run on self-confidence and live on a wave of their own momentum, held up perilously by fleeting success after fleeting success or the inexplicability of America to turn out a niche market large enough to keep them afloat. [link]

Seriously, what in hell makes Charlie Sheen so special?

Ah well... I guess I'll never understand.
But do you know what I do understand?
... A good charitable cause when I see one! (another brilliant segway.)

Recently in listening to Kevin Smith's podcast, I became keenly aware of the plight of former child prostitute Jamie Walton, and how she overcame her drug-dependancy and recovered from her life as a teenager under the thumb of a controlling, cruel male influence that lead her down the path of degradation.

Jamie's story ultimately has a happy ending, but sadly, the same can't be said for many girls.
Across the world, between 300,000 and 800,000 children, boys and girls are coerced, sold or threatened into a life of degrading, sexual subservience, with untold thousands suffering within the United States Alone.

Domestically, there are less than a hundred federally-sanctioned beds from government-funded organizations to help child prostitutes recover once they've been rescued from their lives on the streets.
In eight states, there are no laws to protect children coerced into prostitution. Concurrently, any child prostitute found by the police is arrested and charged as a felon.

Jamie and Kevin want to do something to change all that, and so started "The Wayne Foundation." [link]

As of now it's a very small, fledgling operation devoted to helping in the recovery of former child prostitutes and spreading awareness about this oft-neglected plight.

So you... Yes YOU! Go to their facebook page and "Like" them. [link] Or better yet, go to the website itself and make a fully tax-deductible donation.

Help this fledgling organization get off the ground and prove that you don't need a cape and a mask to fight crime.

Well, in any case, that's about all I have for this journal... But I don't want to end on a downer note. So instead I'll leave you with something HAPPY!
A little treat form the world of "Hollywood Babble-On"

And yes, if you're still in grade school, memorizing and singing this song on school grounds would get you in rather a lot of trouble... So don't you do it!
... That would be WRONG!

[link]

And one more thing as a closing thought... Yes. You can buy this song on iTunes... And if you do, some of the proceeds will go to the American Breast Cancer Foundation... Seriously.
Buying the song "Anne Heche's B***hole" will help in the fight against breast cancer...

... Finally. Something good will come out of Anne Heche's b***hole.

GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!

I rented a horror movie earlier tonight
Cuz' I was in the mood for a scare
It was a remake of "Psycho," that classic Hitchcock film
And I heard that that weird chick would get bare

I watched with anticipation, contemplating m*****bation
For she'd soon reveal her **** to the world
I expected boobs or b***, and maybe just a little tush
I didn't know that she would be my brown-eye girl

Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
I wonder what's inside

Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Lets all go inside

I never thought there'd be a day where this would come to life
I was cast among who'd seen inside her crack
Like Ellen and Steve Martin and James Tucker looked right in
Not to mention that guy from "Fleetwood Mac"

Now everybody knows where they can take a little peek
They will know of what we speak is not a myth
But nobody would know for sure if it was truly there
Had it not been for Ralph Garmin and Kevin Smith

Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
I wonder what's inside

Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Lets all go inside!

I once heard she let Liam Neeson's c*** in her back nine
Now her ring piece can be seen from outer space
So if you go to google earth and zoom in real close
You'll see her a*** looks like Chelsea Handler's face

Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
I wonder what's inside

Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Anne Heche's B***hole
Lets all go inside!